Monday, December 18, 2023

Ode to My PT :-D

I am healing and doing much better in month 2 after my hip replacement. I'm positively bionic! lol I couldn't have made so much progress without my PT, Marla. Her tough love got me here so I wrote her a poem. Side note, the drugs I was on for pain probably helped my creativity along, just sayin'...


                                ODE TO MY PT

Need PT? Go to Marla, then.
She's the real deal, not a charlatan.
She'll push you to your limit, then up the stakes
Squat, squeeze, stretch and march until your body aches
Tai is on the team and takes you through your paces
She'll just smile if you make a lot of faces.
They do look sorry when they cause you pain
It's part of the process is their refrain.
We who are injured, broken, and lame
Feel like we'll never be the same
But Marla knows how this will end
We will all be on the mend
Like a mother bird pushing chicks from the nest
She teaches us to fly and we do the rest,
"You got this," she says, "just do your best.
One more thing, because you require it
Remember not to walk like a pirate."





A Darkish Poem :-)

In medical news, I had a hip replacement on 11/15. I know what you're thinking: but, Barbara, you're so young! lol Actually, I did bring the average age of recipients down a few notches. Anyway, not fun. While my surgeon said I would be "uncomfortable", my own experience was exponentially more intense. So, I wrote a poem:

                                The Truth Hurts

Having a hip replaced is really quite shocking
From the drug-induced haze to the hideous stockings
While the ultimate goal is to get you walking
The incision is gross and leaves you gawking
The pain's so intense it leaves you squawking
PT is so hard you can't help balking.
So you hide in a corner and just start rocking.
But one day you wake up and your knees have stopped locking
The pain has receded and the blues have stopped knocking
And you smile as you toss those hideous stockings.

Wednesday, October 4, 2023

Halloween!

Halloween is upon us! Scary decorations & scary movies everywhere you look. Get in the spirit of things! Read Scary Shorts: Flash Fiction.

Message me if you'd like a review copy. :-)

Halloween Flash Fiction, what could be more fun?  Some stories will give you the creep & keep you up at night staring at the ceiling. Others will make you think twice about your bad decisions.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/55816307-scary-shorts

Monday, July 3, 2023

Merch store! :-D

Happy almost 4th of July! I wanted tell you that my wonderful publisher, Next Chapter, now has a merch store with lots of cool stuff.

Have you ever pined for playing cards, plush blankets, or 1,000-piece puzzles adorned with my book covers?

Have you ever thirsted for shot glasses, coffee mugs, wine glasses, sports bottles, frosted pint glasses or tumblers splashed with images of my book covers?

Have you ever tried on a t-shirt and thought: "If only this shirt had a picture of my favorite Jamie Quinn Mystery?"

Then, good news! You can now satisfy all of those whims by visiting: https://www.litmatter.com/collections/barbara-venkataraman?page=1

Check it out. :-D

Sunday, July 2, 2023

Dog Days of Summer :-D

When the temperature rises and the sweat begins to pool, it's that time of year, the “Dog Days” of summer, July 3rd through August 11. But why Dog Days and not, say, Camel Days? The reference is to Sirius, the Dog Star, the brightest star in the sky. During the “Dog Days” the sun occupies the same region of the sky as Sirius, part of the constellation Canis Major, the Greater Dog.

Because Sirius is so bright, the ancient Romans believed it radiated heat, adding to the Sun’s warmth and causing the sultry weather. They referred to this time as diēs caniculārēs, or “dog days.”

How can we beat the heat? By staying inside and reading a book, of course! Have I got a book for you: Dog Days of Summer: Flash Fiction. Stories of exactly 100 words that evoke childhood memories and make you forget the heat, leaving you with a smile on your face.

All for 99 cents! Such a deal! Sample story below.

Check it out: https://www.amazon.com/Dog-Days-Summer-Fiction-Shorts-ebook/dp/B095J998Q9?ref_=ast_author_dp

CHANGE OF SEASONS By Amy Reade

It was the first day of first grade. The teacher asked Gordie and his classmates to go to the front of the classroom one by one and share one thing they had done over summer vacation. When it was Gordie’s turn, he stood up and told his classmates his dad had taken him fishing at the lake in August. He concluded his presentation by saying “But I hate summer.”

That afternoon as the students waited to be picked up from school, a pretty young woman walked up to Mrs. Haines and introduced herself.

“Hi, I’m Gordie’s stepmother. My name is Summer.”
 

Sunday, April 23, 2023

National Grammar Day! Free book :-D

My dear friend Mrs. Grammar Person is feeling as out of sorts as a misplaced modifier or a dangling participle because she let National Grammar Day slip by without so much as an admiring salute. To remedy this egregious oversight she is thrilled to offer you, her dear readers, a free copy of her definitive guide: "Teatime With Mrs Grammar Person". Ebooks & audiobook codes available. Message me if interested.

https://www.amazon.com/Teatime-Grammar-Person-Barbara-Venkataraman-ebook/dp/B00RUQY6B6/ref=sr_1_9?crid=1QJPHU6L3IVT0&keywords=barbara+venkataraman&qid=1682262748&sprefix=%2Caps%2C220&sr=8-9

Thursday, February 16, 2023

Check Out My Fun Interview on YouTube. 😃

Check out my fun interview on YouTube. 😃  

I was the guest today on "Book Chat with Victoria Young Bennison". We discussed flash fiction and cozy mysteries and whether a didgeridoo is a lethal weapon, lol!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOq_xVUOo4g

Thursday, February 2, 2023

New Book is out! :-D Free review copies

I'm excited that my new book, Five Fortunes, is out on Amazon today! Message me if you'd like a free ebook. 😃 I'd love to collect some reviews.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BTP3BY4P/ref=sr_1_24?crid=5IY822FE357Y&keywords=barbara+venkataraman&qid=1675346795&sprefix=%2Caps%2C91&sr=8-24

Blurb:
When five fourteen-year-old girls get their fortunes from an arcade machine just for kicks, it turns their world upside-down and their close-knit group of friends starts to fall apart.
Misunderstandings abound as allegiances shift and outsiders start to come between them. The fortunes seem to be self-fulfilling prophecies - whether the girls believe in them or not.
Do our beliefs color our perception of the world? Do we ever see ourselves the way others see us, and why is change so hard?
Budding romance, angry bees, teenage fashion influencers, and parents who just don't get it make Barbara Venkataraman's 'Five Fortunes' a fun story you won't soon forget.